Remember the time when I wrote about Jude refusing me and then me just not offering the boob the next night? Well...it happened. Or didn't. (?) Either way, the night before he refused was his last time breastfeeding.
And I'm sad. I don't remember feeling this way after weaning Noah.
When Jude is crying or upset, I have this urge to whip out the boob and comfort him. But I don't even know if I'm all dried up yet or if there's something left. And he doesn't ask for it.
All I know is that urge makes me sad. Sad that I have no physical "somethingness" to give to him from my own body.
All I know is that urge makes me sad. Sad that I have no physical "somethingness" to give to him from my own body.
But he was done. And ... I'm going away in a week anyway. So we're done.
But I'm still kinda sad.
Aww!
ReplyDeleteI know a few "somethingness" he needs from your body, your arms for hugs and your lips for kisses and your hands for holding and your lap for sitting on... :)
you still have cuddles! :)
ReplyDeletevanessa, i love you.
ReplyDeletei read "whip out my boob" and then i curled into a ball and turned red from laughing.
i'm SO immature.
on another note...i ditto the cuddles.
I wonder if I'll feel this way with lily when the day comes. I suspect not as I don't really like breastfeeding- in fact I'd rather pump breastmilk abd then feed it in a bottle! but it may be one of those things that surprises me.
ReplyDelete