reflections on prenatal care {part two}

this is a continuation from my post yesterday. check it out here.

now where was i...? oh yes. my thoughts on prenatal care.

after all that raving about how amazing midwives are, please understand that...
3. not everyone who goes with a midwife will have excellent care. i had a friend in canada who actually ended up transferring her prenatal care to a doctor {from her midwives} because she didn't feel like she was being taken seriously and the concerns she had weren't being addressed properly with the midwife practice she was with. in the end, an OB was the best choice for her and her baby. and that's okay. i think the important thing is that she went with her gut and in the end did what she felt she needed to do for her peace of mind, her health and her baby's health.
my friend in the UK is currently with a midwife who is one of 2 midwives in her area who attend home births {this friend is hoping for her first home birth, although it will be her second birth!}. due to the high demand, my friend has only had a few appointments with this midwife and in some of them she has seemed scattered, unfocused and rushed. this made me sad and a bit annoyed for my friend as this midwife should be seeking to offer a quality of service that she seems unable to provide for her clients due to taking on too many {or so it would seem to me!}. i hope in the end that my friend gets a wonderful home birth experience and that her midwife is able to offer her support and care that is timely and comforting in the time she needs it most. it just seemed sad to me as she commented that she had gotten to know her OB better when she was pregnant the first time. midwife does not always equal nurturing, quantitative {45 mins-1 hr appointments!} care.

4. just because you're in a first world country does not mean prenatal care is going to be awesome. another friend of mine had a beast of a doctor for the first bit of her pregnancy. his rude and unhelpful comments stressed her out and in the end, she fired him and found a better doctor who listens to her and validates her concerns without being condescending or unhelpful. sometimes you have to do "the needful" {as they say here} and leave your OB/midwife if your instinct is telling you that it's not what you want/need.

5. my care here in uganda has been good. i had a midwife {from the UK} giving me my prenatal care up until 36 weeks and then i was transferred to a doctor at the hospital she works closely with and had nothing but rave reviews for him. i am so thankful to have had michele as my midwife here and have nothing but positive things to say about her. she gave me a realistic perspective of what to expect from giving birth in a hospital and in uganda. she gave me insight into the system here and helped me to feel confident despite being an expat "mzungu" {white person}.
i've had two appointments with my doctor and he is soft-spoken but seems competent and confident and from different interactions with people i know here and strangers i've met, i've heard nothing but good things from them as well. i have mixed feelings about giving birth here and in a hospital {mostly the hospital part, to be honest}, but i think that this experience will help me relate to those who have had hospital births in the past as well as give me an opportunity to make the most of this situation - despite the fact that it's not my ideal.

while in the past i might have pushed home births and midwives, i am a little bit older now and hopefully a bit wiser, too. and i am so incredibly thankful for modern medicine, doctors, surgeons and hospitals for the births that are higher risk and more complicated than mine have been. we are blessed.
i have several friends in canada who had high-risk pregnancies due to heart defects, being pregnant with twins and several other issues. i am so incredibly thankful that they had access to the care that they needed for them and for their babies. in another century, who knows what would have happened? so please don't think i am anti-doctor/hospital/medications. i am not.
i think now what i would push is for women to educate themselves. what is best for you and your baby may not be best for everyone. so seek to find out if you like the care presented by doctors or midwives better. maybe you want a home birth but aren't completely comfortable so you look into a birthing center and that becomes your best choice/option. maybe you look into it and decide that a hospital with an epidural is the way to go for you. if you've done your research, i say go for it. {i'd also like to add, that you are stronger than you think you are. and that pain in and of itself isn't necessarily something to be afraid of.}

perhaps with the arrival of this baby i will have begged and pleaded for an epidural. maybe i'll have back labour or maybe my labour will be long and arduous like neither of my other two were. who knows? only God does {as noah likes to remind me}. and so i put my trust in Him and trust that this body that has so graciously and amazingly and miraculously birthed two other babies before baby B can do it again.

i am so looking forward to the journey and the story and sharing it with you when it does happen!

*as always, i love to hear from you, your experiences and dialogue with you. if anything i've said offends or strikes you as incorrect or needs clarifying, please don't hesitate to comment! i understand that the nature of our choices as women and mothers can sometimes cause tension or judgement and that's not my intent at all. i just wanted to share some of my thoughts and reflections on my personal experiences.*