let's talk...

with valentine's day being just 2 days away and being in uganda, i am mourning the lack of conversation hearts to be found here.
back in the day of my blogging life, i used to post "the treat of the month" and no doubt at some point, these were one of the treats i blogged about.
i love candy.

photo credit: flickr

while we were in spain, one of the main session speakers spoke on john 21, but mainly verses 15-23. she talked about how john {the author of john} never refers to himself by name, but by "the disciple Jesus loved". she thought it was probably because he was so consumed by the fact that

Jesus.

loved.

him.

his entire identity was wrapped up in the fact that he was loved by Jesus. amazing.

next we came to the familiar passage where Jesus asks simon peter if he loves him. he asks him this three times.  one commentator reflected that Jesus asked simon three times to get the point across to simon. but john records it three times because there's a point that we need to get.

first Jesus asks simon if he loves him more than these. regardless of what "these" is referring to, the question that jumped out was do I love him MORE? more than candy or comforts or sidewalks or donuts or friends or family or life itself; do i love him more?

it was a fantastic session and i was blown away by the fact that Jesus doesn't call us to love His sheep. he calls us to love Him. when we respond yes, he tells us to feed and take care of his sheep.

Jesus, may i be fully consumed by the fact that YOU love me. may my love for you be all-encompassing, the first love in my life. may i love you more than anything else in this world because all that YOU are, is so much more than enough for me.

so much more

i fell off the running bandwagon for a bit.
it was maybe for a few weeks, but it felt like years. {indoor running really bites.}
i'm happy the weather is somewhat decent again.
we went to my parents' friday-saturday and i brought my running gear and actually psyched myself up to go for a run.
my brother convinced me to go on a trail i was pretty familiar with so i mapped out just over 5km and went for it.
it was drizzly. and kinda cool {weather-wise}, but running on a trail? beside a river? with the birds chirping?
so good.

as i ran i sang in my head a few verses of "nothing but the blood" in time with the pounding of my shoes on the path,

what can wash away my sin?
nothing but the blood of Jesus;
what can make me whole again?
nothing but the blood of Jesus.


oh! precious is the flow
that makes me white as snow;
no other fount i know,
nothing but the blood of Jesus.


it was good to run and clear my head; to sing {in my head} and pray and talk with Jesus and think about Him and what He gave for me.
i thought about what amazing grace it was that i could even just breathe in and out as i pushed my body to run a little bit faster.

it was good.
the boys had just had an egg hunt at my parents' and it was fun to watch noah hop along and scoop up some eggs and find the little presents my dad had stashed for them.
we had brunch and later on went on to jamie's side of the family where we were inundated with candy, chocolate and more candy.
i'm still struggling to figure out how to live in this world and yet to teach my boys that there is so much more to easter {and christmas and life!} than chocolate and candy and food and presents. there is so much more to be gained by knowing Jesus.
and yet
there are sweet memories to be gained by redeeming and enjoying some of our culture's traditions and teaching our children that yes, we do fun things like open presents on christmas and search for chocolate eggs at easter. but without Jesus it's all meaningless.

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.


For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing.


In him was life, and the life was the light of men.

ps i'm totally doing an egg hunt for the boys tomorrow morning. and because we brought home at least 10lbs of candy/chocolate yesterday the only thing that will be edible is pocky. {i'm not a meanie, i promise. my kids go ape-shit crazy for it!} i put pennies, nickels and dimes in plastic eggs and little veggietales characters will be their little gift. i think it's going to be a winner, folks.