on being a school-mom

I am a school-Mama. My boys take the bus to school and so I get to meet the bus kids and parents and then I pick up my kids from school at the end of the day thereby getting to know the parents at the school. It's been fun and awkward and interesting. Interesting because all the other parents of first graders have been at the school {or a school} for the last two years. They know the routines, the teachers, the rules. But I'm the newb. It's okay, though, because I feel like I'm slowly getting the hang of things. 

Today I volunteered in Noah's class for the second time and somehow ended up in charge of making these incredibly complicated paper chain Christmas trees with the kids one-on-one. Seriously. These were hard core. I actually had to re-do one little girl's tree because I had totally done it all wrong. As my boys would say, awkward. 

But it's been good. I'm slowly figuring it out. Mainly I want to be involved with Noah's teachers, his friends and the school. I have no problems with bringing in baked goods to the office staff so I can get on their good side and be remembered. My Mom was involved at my school and while I am not nearly as extroverted as she is, I am doing my best to put myself out there and get to know the people that are seeing my kids for six hours a day. 

On Friday we have parent-teacher interviews with the boys' teachers and I'm looking forward to sitting down with them then.

On an aside, what do teachers want for Christmas? I know they probably get tons of chocolate and stuff. I love to give homemade/meaningful gifts, but I don't want to pile them with things they probably will get tons of anyway. Both boys have female teachers. 

Thoughts?

wednesday morning prayers

I hear foot steps and my door open ever so slightly.
"Mom?"
It's Jude. It's also 6:30am.
"Yes, Jude?"
"Where's Daddy?"
"He's in Halifax."
"Oh. Right."
"Go back to sleep. It's too early."
"But I see a bit of light. It doesn't seem too early to me..."
He wanders back into his room and shortly I after I hear quiet voices and their door shutting. I guess he woke up Noah. They play quietly for a bit.
The play gets louder and wakes up Blaise in the next room. He quiets for a bit and I lay in bed for just a few more minutes.
I check the weather {I have to get back into that habit.} and roll out of bed to go nurse Blaise. {He only woke up ONCE last night!} He's a happy guy and my alarm goes off in my room while I'm in the room with Blaise.
The boys come out of their room and I encourage them to get dressed before going downstairs.
They do.

It's smoothies and toast {and yogurt and cereal for Noah as well} and then the boys brush their teeth.
Jude is bugging to go to school {right.now.} and so I put their lunches in their bags, pack in a rain poncho for this afternoon's forecasted showers and after a bit of playing, they pose on the front steps for a picture for Jude's first day.

How handsome are they?!

We're leaving with plenty of time so I don't feel rushed. Which is nice.
At the school we walk around to Noah's side. We stand there for a minute or two and then give hugs and kisses goodbye so I can drop off Jude at his entrance.
I look back and see Noah standing by himself and it makes my heart hurt a little. I tell myself, he'll be fine.
I'm getting a bit emotional about sending Jude to school today for some reason. He's so little. It's such a long day. How will he do? Will he listen to the teacher and make friends? Will he be able to finish his lunch? {Probably not.}
We walk into the enclosed area and he looks at me with a smile and says, "PLAY?!?" so I nod and he takes off to the slides and climbers and then the bell goes and he comes right over and hops into a line. A helper asks him his name and then directs him to the other line for the other kindergarten teacher. I get a big hug from him and he hugs and kisses Blaise and then chats away to his teacher telling her about his backpack and his Star Wars shirt. Then I look to my side and see Noah standing there with teary eyes.
My heart sinks.

The teacher starts walking in with Jude's class and he happily trots in line behind the other kids. What a trooper.

I turn to walk away with Noah and begin what I've been dreading this entire time leading up to school's start.
We walk into the school all the while with Noah very tearfully and stubbornly telling me he's not going to school and not going to his class and he's staying with me the whole day.
I tell him he is going to school and that he's strong and amazing and he's going to have so much fun and learn new things today. I tell him that Jesus is with him and Noah tearfully says that he can't see Jesus. He can see me and so he wants to be with me. {sob} I try to get to the bottom of why he doesn't want to go but I think it's because I wasn't there to see him into school like I have been since the beginning since I was with Jude. It's also a long day. Every day. And the transition is finally catching up to him.

My heart hurts as I leave him screaming and crying for me with the teacher.
I walk quickly with tears streaming and head back to the car with Blaise {thankful that I chose to put him in the stroller this morning and not carry him like I usually do}.

So it's not even noon and I'm not sure how he's doing. I hope he's doing well. I hope the teacher was able to get a handle on things. I felt bad for her. The little boy in Noah's class who has special needs was also having a rough morning and I didn't see any EA to help her so she was trying to deal with Noah and the other boy.

Jesus please be with Noah and Jude this morning. Send people to love them and protect them. Give them courage and strength and joy today. Remind them of your goodness. Remind me of your goodness. 

**it's 10:57am and I just got a call from his teacher. He settled down within a couple minutes of me leaving. She was so understanding and supportive and I am doing a little happy cry and fist pumping for such an awesome teacher.
Also found out that there is an EA that will be able to help her so that is great for her, for the kids in the class and for that little boy who I hope and pray Noah will get to know and love this year.
Thanks you Jesus!

school-aged

How cute is he?

So. After my emotionally thick post on the first day of school, I thought I'd follow it up with how our first week went.

So I picked Noah up from school the first day. No tears (from him - I did get a bit misty, though) and got a big smile. He did declare, though, that he wouldn't be going back to school the next day. Not emotionally. Just calmly and matter of factly. We talked about his day and I would bring up highlights as he mentioned them.

Oh! You got to finger paint? That's so fun!

Wow! You got Goldfish crackers from your teacher? Did they taste the same or different from the ones Mommy gave you?

A nature hunt? That must have been a lot of fun! What kinds of things did you find?

And each day since, he's calmly declared that he will definitely not be going to school tomorrow. And each day we talk about what he's done during the day. The fun parts and the hard parts.
I think he's doing well, though. He says he's made some friends but doesn't remember any of their names. Classic.
He's got to play with his friend from our town house complex twice who is in grade two so that seems to be a highlight for him.

It still makes my heart ache a bit when I drop him off and watch him trying to politely get through the door with the swarming mass of kids around him. It's a lot all at once. And he's doing really well.

Funny exerpts from him:

Mom, every morning in the hallway I hear a kid crying.

I looked for my hat but I couldn't find it.  (It was exactly where he had left it with me. On the shelf above his backpack.)

We have to sit "criss-cross applesauce". 

Mom? Why can't we have gum at school?

We went to the library, but not really in it. The lady who stays in there said it would be a long time for us to take books out.

I like recess. Wait, no. I don't like it. Well, yes and no. I like the long recess, but not the short recess.

And in other news, he's been holding the door for me all the time. I think his school is big on instilling respect and consideration of others. I love it! (And Jude and him even fought to hold the door open for each other. "No after you!" "No after YOU!" Hilarious.)

thoughts from a sentimental Mama

To every parent who cried dropping their baby (because they're still our babies, right?) off at school for the first time:

I get it.

I'm not a super sappy or sentimental person, but I am a wreck. I am crying and reminiscing and trying to keep it together for the sake of my other kiddos.

We dropped Noah off this morning at school. Grade one. All day. Every day. I was doing okay until I watched him find a seat at a small desk in a small chair across from a couple other boys. I smiled and waved at him and he waved back and I walked away and lost it.

He was so excited and brave and when we walked into the school (was I really the only parent to accompany their kid? Or did I just break some unspoken rule?) he was a bit unsure and wanted me to come with him to pick out a hook to hang his backpack on. Only a pair of shoes, a lunch box and a pencil case and that backpack was heavy. He's so little.

How is it that I remember his birth so clearly? How is it that I'm a Mom to a little boy in grade one? How did that happen?

I wish I could be a fly on the wall in his classroom.
What is he learning? Who is he meeting? Is he loving every minute of it? Is he regretting coming in the first place? Will he know how to find the bathroom and lunch room?

Dear Jesus, please be with my boy. Guard him. Lead him to the friends that will encourage and uplift him. Help him make good choices. 

Did I do enough to prepare him? I feel so unprepared myself.

Last night we did a special dinner together. And by "special" I mean we used a table cloth and had cloth napkins and ate tacos.

It was loud and we ate quickly. Jamie prayed for Noah and we talked about standing up for what's right and being true to ourselves. And then it was all over.

This morning we had Timbits and smoothies and pancakes and applesauce (because apparently we have no fruit in the house. Whoops.) and we prayed again for Noah and I read him Joshua 1:9.

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; Do not be discouraged. For the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go. 

I have been continually praying and releasing my children into God's hands. Surrendering them over and over again. Praying for their teachers and friends.

This parenting gig isn't for the weak of heart.

Mine is getting an overhaul as I type this.

I love you, Noah. I'm so proud of you.

Stay sweet. Have fun. Be a light.