Monday, October 29, 2012

5 things i've learned since becoming a mom: slow down

part four in a five part series of things i've learned since becoming a mom 5 years ago.
you can read part one here, part two here and part three here.

this has been a lesson i've whole-heartedly engaged in over this past year.

slow down.

i'm going to be honest here. we lead a pretty slow life here. some would call it boring. heck, some days i would call it boring. we {the kids and i} don't often leave the house. we don't have preschool or kindergarten to go to. we don't do extracurricular activities and have struggled to find a church to belong to. there are no sidewalks here and walking along the road you're likely to get side-swiped by a taxi {public transit-type van} or a bodaboda {motorcycle}. there aren't public libraries or swimming pools here. we have nothing we're obligated to attend here and for awhile it felt wrong to be so unencumbered by programs or places. 
but then i thought about it for a moment and realized it was a gift. i will never have time like this again with my children. my children will never again be this age and giving me all of their time. every single minute of every single day is spent soaking up time with me. to some this might sound like a death sentence, but i've chosen to see it as a gift and a blessing. i always wanted to be a mom. i wanted to stay at home and raise my kids and right now? now i get to. 
it's amazing to me that noah is 5 and jude is 3 and blaise? he's 6 weeks old as of today! 

i've learned {and am continuing to learn} the beauty and value in slowing down. living in the moment. time goes by fast enough without me wishing for the next stage. how sad it would be for me to blink and realize that i'm 75 years old and i've spent my entire life wishing for time to go by faster so i can get to "insert a time in the future here". there is beauty in the here and now with my children. 

the long, lanky legs of my 5 year old, racing up and down our driveway. 
the hilarious "hey wait" that jude says every other sentence.
the sweet coos from blaise as he makes eye contact with me.

these are the moments that disappear before i can appreciate where i am if i'm always looking for what's coming up next.

i am tired and sleep deprived and sometimes short on patience, but this time is short and it will pass and i will have difficulty remembering the harder moments. all i will remember will be the sweet moments of sitting with jude on my lap at the table as we draw pictures together and giggle at the way jude calls a scarf a "scarft". the moments where noah throws his arm around jamie as they sit together on the couch. the moments of holding a sweetly sleeping baby who sighs and smiles in his sleep. these are the ones i want to remember and soak up.

so i am learning to slow down. in fact, this one lesson has been so incredibly valuable and precious to me that i already have small fears creeping in about returning to canada and the fast pace of life that i will encounter and undoubtedly struggle with. but that will be another lesson to be learned. all in good time, right?


  1. not gonna lie, i am sometimes jealous of the enforced-slowness of your life. it is handy to have parameters & boundaries imposed on you, sometimes.

    but don't fear coming back to canada... it will be different, yes. but you will embrace it as it is, and hold to the things you value, and i feel certain that you will make life here just as beautiful :)

  2. Amen! Something I have also been learning, although it has been a challenge to embrace the slow pace and I often have to catch myself getting involved in too much and remind myself that its ok to say no.

  3. What a great post! Daniel and I have lived on land out in the country since we got married, and have never gotten tv. I have definitely noticed a change in myself...where I used to love being around people all the time, I now look forward to coming home when I'm in town doing errands. My neighbour is even "slower" than me, and is a very 'homemade' type wife and mom. I often find myself inspired by her :) Great post! I can't wait to read the fifth!

  4. what a wonderful reminder... love the line "but i've chosen to see it as a gift and a blessing." that's what it's really all about - choice!
    thank you for sharing this - it is a reminder that I really needed and on the day I really needed it.


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