first friday in june links

i'm on day 2 of solo parenting with jamie in mbale until monday. it's going pretty well so far.
i think it helps that the boys {and i!} have been sleeping well. thank you, Jesus!
this morning noah was up early and shortly thereafter jude was, too. they played for a bit and then we all got dressed and i made those banana muffins i've been craving while the boys watched noah's birthday videos {i asked friends and family to send videos to noah wishing him a happy birthday last october and he still loves watching them. so thank you to those who sent them!} and ate yogurt while they waited for the muffins to finish baking.
then noah proceeded to eat three muffins.
seriously. he's already eating me out of house and home. it's a good thing i doubled the batch.

potty training with jude is going so well! we go on outings with him in underpants and he lets me know when he needs to go. if we're at home, he'll run to the bathroom and go on his own. yesterday he peed standing up. i'm one proud mama. thankful this has been a low-stress undertaking.

jude had a blast wearing water wings while we were in jinja. my little water babies.

here are your weekend links!

recently i have a love-hate relationship with LEGO. noah loves to dump it out, but getting him to clean it up is sometimes like torture. this morning it wasn't so bad, but last night? brutal. and the teensy, tiny, itty bitty pieces? that's going to be trouble when baby b is born and crawling around. anyway, i have a feeling it's just going to be part of our lives for the next oh, 10 years or so. more? yikes. anyway, i love this LEGO birthday party for a 6 year old. 

and i am so making this popcorn. sweet and salty? you had me at hello.

and it's june 1st! crazy how fast time is just flying by. i love this website. there are "ways to play" for each month of the year. this is from last june, but it's a great list and you can download the list from each month.

i'm totally crushing on chevrons. and picnics? who doesn't love a picnic? combine the two and it's a beautiful thing.

101 spring freezer meals. 'nuff said. {this list is AWESOME.}

this blog post. it's so tragic that things like this happen all the time here in uganda and in other countries in africa. i am facebook friends with keren and she is fighting for justice for women and families here in uganda and for cihldren to stop being taken from families and placed up for adoption or other heart-breaking situations. please check it out. let's all get educated about what's really happening behind the scenes of adoption.

potty training second time around

so we're sorta potty training jude. okay i guess we are now.
for the last few months we've been pretty laid-back about it all. i'm still feeling laid-back about it.
but it's a significantly different approach than when i potty trained noah.
noah was 3 years and 3 months old when i had had enough of diapers and felt like i had a handle on taking care of a baby and a preschooler at the same time. he was very ready and able to grasp the concept of feeling the urge to pee/poop and then taking the appropriate action. he day-trained in 3 days. he'd hold his pee until he got to the toilet, pull down and up his pants on his own and then report back to me that he had peed. it was amazing and honestly, quite unexpected.
this time around, i'd love to have jude potty trained by the time the wee one is born.
but i've had a very laid-back approach. we had a potty out. sometimes he'd use it. sometimes we'd put underpants on him. sometimes a diaper. mostly a diaper.
but today i just decided to go for it.
i mean, it's not like we go anywhere. {seriously. we are mostly home-bound here. no library. no school. no parks. rare play dates. yeah. i'm living a hermit's life. but that's how it is. and i'm okay with it. for now.}
so underpants it was today.
he's mostly grasped the concept except it usually takes him wetting his underpants a bit first and then managing to hold the rest in until he gets to the toilet. so we go through several pairs of underpants each day. which is okay. he cried at first when it happened, but i assured him it was okay and that he just has to do the rest of his pee in the potty.
he generally goes if i encourage him to go.
and slowly-slowly he's getting it.
it's cute to see his little bum in underpants.
but he still calls "pee", "poo". which is hilarious to me for some reason.
so it's the laissez-faire approach to potty training. which is just fine by me. no need to stress about it. {especially because i have high-blood pressure right now.}
i admire and give props all those who potty trained their 17 month olds {or younger or their kids potty trained themselves at a young age}. but that just isn't for me. call it lazy parenting. i prefer not to stress about things that aren't necessary. eventually they figure it out.

underpants! v. 4.0

After Sunday's fiasco the potty chair "disappeared" by Monday morning {it got cleaned and put into a bag which I promptly put in the trunk of our car to give back to the friend I borrowed it from}.

And after a somewhat rough start to our day, Noah succumbed to the potty seat that fits on top of the toilet. And since then we've had no problems. Except for using public washrooms; while he's a champ about being willing, how on earth do other Mothers deal with the "point your pee-pee* down!" issue? Tonight at McD's he peed on the toilet, but for the first second or two it ran straight down the front of the toilet all over his underpants and pants.
I'm wondering if standing is a better option?

Anyway, I'm proud of my little {big} guy. He's potty trained. {Daytime only. Every night he complains about having to wear a diaper, but until he wakes up dry, he's not going to sleep in underpants. Fin.}

*Funny story. So I've alternated between "penis" and "pee-pee" but apparently "penis" has stuck. We were at a friend's house the other day {a little girl} and Noah and his friend were playing with Play-Doh and stamping them into letters. He happened to make a "P" and proudly showed me: 
"Look Mom! A "P"!"
I said: "Yes! You're right. That is a "P"! What is "P" for?"
Noah: "'P' is for penis!"
Me: "Er. yes. Or peanut? polar bear? petunia?"
Good times.

underpants! v. 3.0

Today I had my "I've had it!" moment with potty training.

Well, all things considered, Noah is doing awesome with it. I mean, he literally potty trained in 2 days. So much more than I could have expected.

But he will only go in his potty chair. So this morning in our rush to get out of the house to church after Noah's prolonged tantrum about putting on his boots and coat and then finally getting him buckled into his car seat and pulling out of the driveway he announces

I HAVE TO GO PEE!

Me=anger!anger!anger!

So in we went and I told him {in my anger} that today was the last day for his potty chair and tomorrow it was going to go away and he would have to use the toilet seat {we have a little insert to make it easier}. He seemed okay with this, not thrilled, but fine with the idea.
Then he peed his pants at church.

So tomorrow will be phase 2 of potty training. So we'll see how it goes.

Also: I have anger issues.

underpants! v. 2.0

Potty training is going really, really well. He was pretty much trained yesterday. This is day 3 and he initiates on his own, pulls down and up his underpants and his pants {although he's been going jogging pants styles even though I'm partial to my kids in jeans...but whatever makes potty training easier, right?}, he woke up this morning and had "saved" his pee for the potty instead of filling his diaper {this is huge!} and he did a poop in the potty today {yesterday I tweeted this:}

...which as you can see is a vast improvement on where yesterday's poop ended up.

We've gone to Starbucks, grocery shopping, outside to play in the snow and I think because I just prepare myself for accidents, I'm pleasantly surprised at his ability to hold his pee and his ability to let me know when he needs to go before it's dripping down his leg.
This morning as I had just turned on the car {both boys strapped into their car seats} to take Jamie to work, Noah said, "I have to pee!" so out he came and I took him in to pee. A bit of a setback on a normal day, but for us in the midst of potty training - this is huge!

He was very ready for this, I just needed to make the first move. 

So proud of my big guy.

Now...to get him to pee in a toilet. Any thoughts? Advice? {He is adamant about only going on his "potty chair".}

underpants!

So potty training is going well. Noah initiates on his own and when he tells me he's usually got enough control to hold it until he's on the potty.
We attempted an outing to Starbucks this morning and he did great! Didn't have to pee, but guzzled a whole glass of "Starbucks water" {aka tap water in a Starbucks cup.} and had an accident once we got home but managed to get to the potty somewhat in time and then peed again 10 minutes later in the potty.

Anyway, it's going well. I'm thinking he could have been potty trained months ago, but I'm glad we waited until now. I'm ready {and determined} but more importantly he is ready.

It's amazing the things you are proud of when you're a parent.

Potty Training Game plan

Potty training deets:

First three days:
1. movie watching in the kitchen {to help him stay put in a non-carpeted area}
2. lots of juice - he's a guzzler and loves juice so this isn't hard. {to stimulate lots of pee "feelings" to help him get used to going on the potty}
3. treats! every time he goes on the potty he gets to pick one treat - either an M&M or a jelly bean {to further motivate and reward going on the potty}
4. underpants, not pull ups {to help him feel the wetness - kids know pull ups are diapers.} and no pants {to make it easy to whip the underpants down at the slightest inclination of having to pee}

I'm not into the whole "train your kid in 3 days" but I am doing the first three days a bit more intentionally so as to kick start the whole process and help Noah to have lots of practice feeling the urge to pee and actually going.

I do have pull ups for long car trips and I think I'll try using them for overnights (although Noah is a heavy wetter/pooper at night} in the hopes that he'll learn to pee mostly during the days.

Essentially after the first few days he'll have a better idea of what he's supposed to do and then we'll hopefully just go out and about like we normally do and hope for the best. I fully anticipate accidents and set backs, but at this point I've set my mind on potty training and so we're moving forward and hoping for the best.

I'm totally open for advice and ideas if you've got any!

tantrums and my own issues

Lately I've been struggling with my responses to Noah's meltdowns. Like screaming-in-my-face-in-the-middle-of-Chapters meltdowns. Like throwing-metal-cars-across-the-room meltdowns.
Everything in me just melts down into one emotion: pure rage. And then embarrassment if we're somewhere public. And then frustration because I don't know how to make.it.stop.
I read somewhere {Raising Boys, maybe?} about testosterone surges in boys at ages 3 and 7 and then of course during puberty I think. This would explain the pure rage and anger Noah exhibits, but how to explain mine?
I've mostly been able to keep it under check but it's definitely a wake up call that I need to work through my issues of control and pride {because that's what causes my embarrassment in a public situation}.
But it's frustrating to feel like I'm back here again. Working through these issues all over again.

Today I decided to play out a future situation with Noah.

Me: Noah, we're going to Hannah's house after lunch. And we're going to stay and play there for awhile. But after awhile we're going to have to leave and come back home. So when I say "Noah. It's time to go." You need to say, "Okay Mom." and then we'll get our coats and boots on. Okay?

Noah: Okay.

Me: So let's practice. Noah. We're having a fun time at Hannah's house but it's time to go.

pause


Me again: So what do you need to say?

Noah: Um...okay Mom. Boots and coats, now?

We rehearsed this a few more times and I also reminded him of this in the car on the way there.
While we were there we had a minor struggle for a diaper change {more on our goal of The Great Potty Training of 2011 later} and I reminded him of his response when I would soon tell him that it was time to go.

And then when it was time...it worked! He said, Okay! {and then quickly asked if he could watch something on tv while I prepared dinner when we got home.}
So all the rehearsing worked. I wasn't a believer of the practicing and preparing beforehand in the past, but I guess I needed to actually get him to say the words and pretend. I think it helped a lot.

I hope this will help the rage in our household. Because Jude watches and is The Ultimate CopyCat in his spitting and hitting and saying "NO!". It's shocking because he's so young, and kinda scary at how much he picks up from watching Noah so I'm really trying hard to set firm ground rules of expected behaviour because I do NOT want my children screaming in my face, much less anyone else's!

It's truly a good thing they are so cute because all I have to do is look at pictures like these {no matter how my day has been} and my heart goes to mush.

Not ready yet

The other day I put Noah back in "underpants" and he was loving it. We kept reminding him "Make sure you tell Mommy or Daddy if you have to go pee or poo so you can sit on the potty."
At one point he was wearing his pajama top, underpants, his rubber boots and a mask with a feather on it. I wish I had taken a picture. It was pretty awesome.

He did well but didn't actually go pee or poo. Until he had a fit about something (I forget) and melted down. Seconds later he came up to me and said,

"My pants are wet, Mommy."

Oh. Yeah. That would be the pee, buddy.

So clearly NOT ready for underpants yet. Oh well. We'll keep trying every time we sense interest.

Bad Mommy Moment #257

On Wednesdays Noah has a swimming lesson at the YMCA at 4pm. I figured after the boys had their naps we'd head over and I could get in a workout before the lesson. Of course this would be the day when Jude actually has a proper nap (ie longer than 40 mins) and he sleeps until 3!

So I feed Jude, get the boys ready and pack our bags and we're off to the Y.

I drop the boys off at the playcare center, have a quick 25 min run/walk and then pick up Noah and we go to the change room.

We both get changed into our bathing suits and the lesson goes well. Noah loves to jump off the side and play with all the pool toys. He's not a fan of doing floats and is getting better at kicking. He still thinks "blowing bubbles" means inhaling water. Not a good scene.

Anyway, so the lesson finishes and we head to the change room. I strip Noah down only to realize I forgot to pack him a diaper.

His previous diaper was wet and now in the garbage.

What

to

do?

Well, I put on his pants (no undies, nothing!) and tell him if he has to pee that he should tell me. Then I let him play in the little "house" that is in the change room while I get changed. I get him out of the house only to see he has already peed in his pants.

Potty Training Fail.

I am glad I put on a dark pair of jeans on Noah today. We hustle out of the change room, pick up a very tired and cranky Jude and then go to the car. Noah shows some discomfort at the feeling of walking in wet jeans, but doesn't really seem to mind his current situation. I root through our "emergency" pack in the car and THANKFULLY find a diaper that fits him. I change his diaper on the drivers seat and we drive home. Him in his boots, diaper and winter jacket.

Oh well.