Friday, September 28, 2007

labourless in Haliburton

This weekend I'm travelling 3 hours north to Haliburton for a big retreat with Campus for Christ. I'm hoping and praying with all my heart that I do NOT go into labour this weekend.
But I've talked it over with Baby Strickie and he agrees to stay put for the time being. So at least we're on the same page.
I'll let ya know on Monday!

Thursday, September 27, 2007

torn - but not "all out of faith"

Right now I seem to be in limbo. No...that's not quite the right word for it. More like...stretched? Torn?
Between a lot of things - but a few things in particular;
- the desire to stay on campus and go hard and the knowledge that I DO need to take it easy and not go too physically hard (and my body's response to the physical activity is always a warning sign for me to slow down)
- the desire to stay in campus ministry (period) and the excitement and anticipation for what lies ahead as I will become a Mom in a very short while
This last one has been a struggle especially because I am seeing so much fruit even in this past month! 2 girls coming to know Christ personally, finally "getting it" (well, at least more than I have before) in terms of discipleship and the whole aspect of evangelism, understanding my schedule and what's a good use of my time and how to schedule it better. It's hard because I don't want to leave. It's humbling to remember that I myself am not necessarily "needed" by God, but that all He needs and wants is a vessel that is available. Perhaps I am more available now than I have ever been.
BUT...at the same time I am ridiculously excited at the prospect of having this baby and becoming a mom and being able to nurture him and experience the joys and challenges of raising a child. A little boy.
You know what's really weird for me to write? I'm going to write it right now. My son.
SO WEIRD.
*insert freak out here*
ANYWAY...so I'm really enjoying my job/vocation (whatever you want to call it) but I'm also anticipating this next phase at the very same time.
So torn would be a good word for me to use.

Monday, September 24, 2007

cankles R us

Today I finally know what swollen ankles look like.
Oh.My.Word.
I looked down at my feet this evening after getting home from grocery shopping and was shocked to see my right ankle looking grotesquely large. It was so hideous I sat down right away and propped my feet up - and I couldn't stop staring at it! It's still somewhat swollen, but I drank a lot of water (as recommended by Jenn) and kept my feet up until I had to go to the bathroom (or get a snack).
I think everything is coming on me all at once.
1. I'm hungry a lot now.
2. My ankles swell.
3. My temperature seems to be consistently warmer than Jamie's. For the entire summer people have been saying to me "Wow - this summer must have been a hot one for you!" but it's been honestly just as hot for me as anyone else. But NOW...Jamie always wants to close the windows or balcony door and I'd prefer to keep it open since I'm always a little warm.
So...yeah.
Here I am...8 months pregnant and actually still loving it. Even the cankle.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

chubby cheeks

I forgot to mention one thing about the ultrasound.
While the technician was showing me the baby, she kept saying "Nice cheeks." "Those are some great chubby cheeks."
She was talking about the face cheeks of the baby, but still...it was just kinda funny that she commented twice about his cheeks.
Oh well. I did say I wanted a chubby baby! :)

the move

Today we moved. Across the parking lot.
It was a good move and we ended up having a ton of help! (Thanks to Matt, Lucas, Nathan P, Kirsten, Jenn, our parents, Kevin, Keven, Nick, John, Ryan...I think that's it). It was great and got finished pretty quickly. We still have a fair bit to unpack and reorganize, but a lot of it got finished before 3 this afternoon.
I really like our new apartment and have enjoyed unpacking the baby stuff and look forward to when everything is unpacked and set up. I will take pictures when everything "looks nice" and then post them.
Right now I've got a great view of the sunset outside our balcony door. It's beautiful.
And so great to have a balcony.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

ultrasound update

I just got a call from the intern at the midwifery clinic with the news of my ultrasound.
Here are the deets:
- the baby is a good size, not too big or small for the predicted due date
- my placenta is in a good position - no longer covering the cervix
- it looks as though my cervix has shortened (which I looked up to mean that this happens in preparation for birth and if it happens too soon can mean that labour or premature labour is on its way) but she said not too worry as everything looks fine and we can still anticipate everything on schedule (as much as you can with pregnant I suppose)
And basically everything looks good.
That's good to know. I'm glad I didn't spend the last few months worrying about the possibility of a C-section due to Placenta Previa or whatnot.
And that's that.
I have had some Braxton Hicks contractions today I think but nothing major.
And I think I've gone to the bathroom at least 7 or 8 times so far today.
CRAZY.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

being pregnant

My newest saying to describe how I feel:
I'm large and in charge.

Except I'm totally not in charge of this pregnancy. For the first time I feel somewhat uncomfortable. I walk slower and I think I'm starting to get a waddle. Walking for long distances really puts pressure on my lower abdomen as gravity and a growing child inside of me is taking its toll.
I'm going to the bathroom at least once a night...often twice.
Usually I can get comfortable when trying to fall asleep, but sometimes it's a bit harder to find that comfy position.
Stretch marks are starting to take up residence on my sides but they're just little right now.
Painting and physical labour is not conducive to being 8 months pregnant.
Still loving being pregnant (I'm not lying. Or trying to convince myself.) and most of the time I just feel like I will feel this way for the rest of my life.
On my walk from my car to the University Centre I was pondering that fact. That I feel like I'm going to be pregnant for forever. Or at least a long time. I think it's because often when things happen to your body (like you gain weight, etc.) you often stay that way for awhile. (Often, not always) but the change is so gradual that rarely does it produce an outcome - such as a new life that shifts from one stage (being pregnant) to another (not being pregnant and having a baby to take care of).
Anyway, I'm really tired right now so I'm not entirely sure if this makes sense.
But that's my post for today.

tired and paint covered

If I weren't pregnant I would lie down on my stomach on the newly installed carpet in my new apartment.
But I am pregnant. And I'm fairly certain lying down on my back would just make me feel uncomfortable.
I.Am.Exhausted.
After 2 evenings of painting we are DONE painting the spare room (aka Spare Oom) (colour: Spa Blue), the Baby's room (Golden Champagne), our bedroom (Manilla Tan) and the kitchen cabinet doors (good ole black).
Overall, I am pleased with the outcome.
I've learned that I'm not good with being patient in the interim. I like to have the final product - NOW. To see those walls with 1 coat of paint and the lack of paint in some areas, the imperfect cracks and uneven ceilings (some apartments just have uneven walls!) was frustrating for me. I fretted and worried (not too much, though) over whether it was worth it to paint if it was going to look so bad. But after a healthy second coat I'm pleased and content at the fact that we are done painting, but more pleased that after all that work (and money) it looks really good.
Now to get those doors back up on the cabinets.
I'm impatient.
It's true.
A truism some might call it.

Friday, September 14, 2007

the best thing


There is no one in this world that I love more than my husband Jamie. He's my most favourite person to be around and I can't ever say that I've been "sick" of spending time with him. And we do spend quite a bit of time together. Even compared to a lot of married couples I know.
Today while I was thinking about this baby coming into the world I vowed to myself that I will love and care for this child of ours with all that I know how to, but Jamie will always be my number 1 love. And I think our kids will actually appreciate that about our relationship. What kid wouldn't be thrilled to know that his parents are in love with each other, their relationship is steady and loving and that no one is leaving anyone?
I think kids are different than husbands or wives. You don't necessarily get to "choose" your kids. They are given to you with their set personalities and whatnot. Albeit some things are more nurture than nature, but they are who they are. But spouses...that's entirely different (unless you had an arranged marriage). Out of all the men in the world...I chose Jamie. Out of all the women in the world, he chose me. He wasn't obligated to marry me and he didn't get "stuck" with me because I was the only one left. When our kids grow up and leave to start their own lives, it will be just Jamie and I again. And I want to be just as thrilled about that as I am about spending time with just him right now.
I am my most comfortable when I am with him. I am the most "me" I ever am when I'm around him. He makes me laugh. I'm not embarrassed to cry around him. I can tell him anything and he'll never love me less but in fact loves me more and more with every day that passes. And it's amazing to have someone feel that way about you when that's exactly how you feel about them. It's pretty much the best thing in the world.

2nd prenatal class

Last night was our second prenatal class. We watched the dreaded birthing videos.
I was both curious and grossed out (preemptively) to see little heads coming out of vaginas. (On an entirely immature side note, I think I'm the only one in the entire class that giggles when she says "vagina" or "vaginas are very stretchy" or anything like that - I'm so immature.)
However, the video was not that bad and although it WAS extremely close up it was set to music (sounds delightful I'm sure) and so you didn't get to hear all the screaming/moaning/weird noises the women were making. So it looked almost surreal and peaceful - which is definitely something that you DON'T get to see on TLC.
Anyway so that was interesting.
I learned how much I don't know about the woman's anatomy - specifically with the baby inside. We were supposed to label a picture (kinda like in health or science class) and I had no idea that the arrow pointing to the uterus was the uterus. *shrug* Oh well. Now I know I guess.
I did get the mucous plug, though.
There sure are a lot of things to do with pregnancy and labour and birth that sound really disgusting.
I think my thoughts concerning birth after seeing that video are the following:
1. birth is gross - lots of fluid and blood and ickiness and that's just kinda gross - natural and normal...but still gross.
2. birth is amazing - it's still blowing my mind that a little human being just comes out of women and that's how this earth is populated. Watching that little head push forward and then the rest of the body practically shooting out is pretty incredible.
3. birth is hard and scary but the body is pretty astounding at coping and putting up with so much pain - I also learned that the woman pushing only contributes to 30% of pushing the baby out - it's actually your body/uterus that does most of the pushing to get that baby out. Absolutely amazing!
Anyway, so I'm both amazed and yet kinda grossed out in a normal way. I would say I'm more amazed than grossed out.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

gimpy

I am an invalid.
Yesterday I had a treatment done on my foot that was extremely painful. I cried because the pain was so excruciating. Then I hobbled around everywhere.
I finally gave in last night and took some Tylenol (I've tried to avoid drugs since being pregnant) and that helped a lot. I had to take it to fall asleep but being pregnant and having to make 3 bathroom trips in one night with one foot when you're half-blind doesn't make for the best night sleep.
Today I decided I shouldn't go on campus. The pain has subsided somewhat, but I still can't walk on it. This morning I accidentally kicked the heel of my foot with my other foot and the pain was unbearable. So I'm trying to limit moving around in my house.
I wondered if this is preparation for asking for help, admitting that I can't do things on my own (I like to be fairly self-sufficient) and taking time to stop and slow down. So today when I woke up and my foot was still swollen and sore I figured staying home today would be a wise thing even though I felt bad about bailing out of my appointments. I hate cancelling on people - it's really hard for me to do because I think that it reflects poorly on my character. I think that sometimes I just have to know what I can and can't do and stop trying to prove that I'm a soldier and can tough it out.
Besides, no one wants to watch an 8 month pregnant woman hobble around a university campus. Nor do I want to damage any other muscles from walking awkwardly due to my inability to use both my feet the way they were created to be used.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

low iron

Oh and I don't remember if I blogged about this but my iron is still low so I'm supposed to be taking iron supplements.
To be honest, I'm not exactly happy about this. The supplement my midwife wants me to take is called - crap I forget already - anyway...so this iron supplement comes in liquid form and I have to take it 3 TIMES A DAY!!! I barely remember to take my prenatal vitamins, how can I remember this? And I have to take it with OJ and avoid dairy products and make sure not to have coffee or tea or anything with caffeine because it inhibits my body's ability to absorb the iron...yadda yadda yadda.
So I need to remember to go and buy that tomorrow before I completely forget all about it.

big baby?

I had another midwife appointment today - but it wasn't with my midwife. It was with the intern. She's great, though. She's in her last year of midwifery so she's done at least a couple internships already.
So we chatted away, she told me some stuff about some disease I can get tested for and then we did the usual - blood pressure, feeling the baby's position, measuring the growth and listening for the heartbeat.
But this time when she measured the growth of the baby (from top of the pubic bone to top of the baby - usually just under the rib cage) she was shocked at how much he had grown since the last appointment. So much so that she went off to find a second opinion. When she couldn't find my usual midwife she had to get another one (who was just as lovely and nice as my usual midwives) who measured and confirmed that I had indeed grown quite a bit in 2 weeks. She also said I have a nice belly. :)
So my last appointment I measured at 31.5 cm and this time I was 37 cm. Which apparently is a lot.
So as of right now I don't really know what this means.
He either:
a) had a huge growth spurt and probably won't grow by heaps from now until my next appointment
b) is being pushed up by the placenta causing him to - uh...I don't know exactly. But something to do with my placenta
c) will be a big baby (please no...8 lbs or less!)
d) could possibly be due earlier?

So...I have an ultrasound next week so they'll check that out and find out what the situation is.

Other than that, I think everything is same old, same old.
I can't wait until we move into our new place so I can get this baby's room all set up!

moving

What an ordeal. We're trying to move from our current apartment to a 3 bedroom apartment that is literally across our parking lot. Owned by the same company and managed by the same superintendent.
So originally we were supposed to move in this Saturday - September 15th. So we made plans for that.
Then our super calls and tells us we can't move in until the 18th.
Then we decide we'll paint on the 18th and move on the 19th.
Then we figure that moving mid-week is really inconvenient and ask our super if we can move in on a weekend.
She says it's now possible to move on the 15/16th but then changes her mind and so we finally decide on the 22nd. So we'll probably get in there before and do some painting but hold off on the moving until the 22nd.
So...the final move-in date is: Saturday, September 22nd.
I think.

a watery incident

Well tonight started off with a bang. Or rather a drip. Or many drips.
I was sitting at the kitchen table typing away on my laptop when I heard splashing noises behind me. I turned around and noticed that the kitchen sink was full and over flowing. Like gushing over flowing.
I think I probably squealed for Jamie to come because our kitchen was flooding and then I ran to find the phone to call the super while Jamie held the plug in the bottom of the sink. On my way back to the kitchen I grabbed a towel (one of the few that are left out - I happened to pack up all our towels only just yesterday) and threw it on the ground. Water was now all over the floor and seeping into the living room carpet.
The super came over and in her adorable Newfie accent was saying "Oh my God. Oh my God."
The flow eventually stopped as Jamie was able to plug the sink (the water was coming UP from the drain) and we managed to mop up the floor and clear most things out of the way.
Currently the plumber is over and the super is back and I'm sitting with my foot up (currently I'm a bit of an invalid thanks to an extremely painful wart treatment on my foot) and writing about the incident while everyone else to clean up the mess.
So I'm about as useful as crumbs are at keeping mice away.
What a night.

Sunday, September 9, 2007

I live in a bubble

Sometimes I realize the bubble I live in. I look into a mirror and realize how sheltered I am and how cushy life is for me.
I was flicking through some channels and happened upon a show called Ransom Squad which is all about a squad in Sao Paolo, Brazil (the #1 kidnapping capital in the world) and how these people try and rescue kidnap victims.
I can't imagine living in constant fear of being kidnapped or held for ransom (not that anyone close to me has millions of dollars to give in random money) for money that my husband or family may or may not have.
To witness this squad driving through shanty towns and to see the absolute poverty these people live in is ... mind blowing. We have so much here. Peace of mind. Safety. Wealth. Education. Comfort. Freedom of religion. It's incredible.

Friday, September 7, 2007

some tidbits

Well it has been an interesting week to say the least.
1. I haven't received so many double takes in my life. Being back on the university campus I can almost see the confusion in all the first year's eyes. "Is she a student?" "Is she a first year? But she's pregnant..." "I'm confused."
I got asked if I was a first year at least twice and I couldn't help but let out a laugh at the absurdity of the question. Really? You really think someone would come to school when they only have a month and a bit left on campus? That seems ridiculous to me.
So that was interesting. But funny.
2. Jamie and I went to our first prenatal class. It was...pretty good. My favourite part of the first class was when we talked about the pain of labour and the instructor described the general idea of what contractions feel like (usually) so I feel like I have a better idea.
Jamie has officially left his mark as "the funny guy" I'm pretty sure. The instructor handed out a sheet titled, "Affirmations for Pregnancy and Labour". We were supposed to read through them and pick the one that suited us best and that we liked the best.
Jamie picked: My cervix opens easily like a flower to the sun.
Right.
So that got a few laughs.
I picked: My body knows how to birth our baby. Women have been birthing successfully for thousands of years.
And it's true.
Anyway, so I'm pretty tired from a really full week back on campus and am going to hit the hay so I can be somewhat rested for our busy day tomorrow in Toronto...baby shower #2.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

braxton hicks

I had another midwife appointment. It went well. I met the new intern and she's in her last placement which means she's more experienced. She'll be around when I give birth which should be good!
Not too much happened. We talked about breast feeding and braxton hicks contractions and then they took blood again to see if my iron had gone up at all (oh I sure hope so).
I asked them what a Braxton Hicks contraction felt like because a few people had asked me if I'd had them yet and I didn't know what they felt like.
Well, wouldn't you know it, last night I was at a bar to see my friend's brother play in a band and near the end my stomach got really tight and I started to feel crampy. Exactly how they had described it. It was uncomfortable and a tiny bit painful but everything was fine and it went away.
So that was weird...but ironic that the week I ask about it, I actually get one!
So that's my big news so far.
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