running and stuff

I'm in a sweet spot with running right now. This morning I did my run at the Y and it felt so good. I've moved past the wall of feeling like I'm going to die and though I still prefer to run outside it feels so great to know that my cardio has improved and I am becoming more and more fit and strong.
One thing I've learned {or remembered} is that I'm highly motivated by music. Lately I can't get enough of Songza's Sunshine Indie Workout mix and today I was just flying. In fact, often when I'm running and I hear a song that makes me smile and pick up my pace, what I really want to be doing is this:

And you know what? I think I should probably go for a fist pump or over-the-head-hand-clap if I feel like it because do you see anyone else paying attention to this guy? Nope. Me neither. This guy is killing it. {Check out the YouTube video for the whole video. This guy has some moves.}

So that's me. I'm working out and it's become a good little routine for us in the mornings; me exercising and Blaise {and Jude every other day when he's not at school} hanging out with the stellar childcare workers and doing adorable little crafts. Everyone wins!

I know. I still suck at blogging these days. And that's okay. I'm trying to soak it all in and one day I'll come back more consistently. But for now you can follow me on Instagram for a daily look at life around these here parts.

Hang in there! Winter has to end eventually! {Right?}

reflections

sigh.

i haven't picked up my camera in days.

i always find it difficult to blog or know what to blog when there's so much going on.
that's me right now.

living with my parents. in a new {old} city. seeing friends. missing friends. settling in. preparing to move across the world.
you know, normal stuff.

i'm running again.
with moving and settling in and vacationing i kinda fell off the bandwagon and my clothes are telling me that running again - it's a good idea.
i still have a sweet tooth that has a life of its own.

also, jamie just showed me this website and i really, really want to do it. with him. {how psycho cool are we?}

on sunday our pastor talked about the value in reflecting on your life experience and how it's the reflection that causes growth, not necessarily the experience.
i am striving to reflect more.
if only life would slow down enough for me to do that.

so much more

i fell off the running bandwagon for a bit.
it was maybe for a few weeks, but it felt like years. {indoor running really bites.}
i'm happy the weather is somewhat decent again.
we went to my parents' friday-saturday and i brought my running gear and actually psyched myself up to go for a run.
my brother convinced me to go on a trail i was pretty familiar with so i mapped out just over 5km and went for it.
it was drizzly. and kinda cool {weather-wise}, but running on a trail? beside a river? with the birds chirping?
so good.

as i ran i sang in my head a few verses of "nothing but the blood" in time with the pounding of my shoes on the path,

what can wash away my sin?
nothing but the blood of Jesus;
what can make me whole again?
nothing but the blood of Jesus.


oh! precious is the flow
that makes me white as snow;
no other fount i know,
nothing but the blood of Jesus.


it was good to run and clear my head; to sing {in my head} and pray and talk with Jesus and think about Him and what He gave for me.
i thought about what amazing grace it was that i could even just breathe in and out as i pushed my body to run a little bit faster.

it was good.
the boys had just had an egg hunt at my parents' and it was fun to watch noah hop along and scoop up some eggs and find the little presents my dad had stashed for them.
we had brunch and later on went on to jamie's side of the family where we were inundated with candy, chocolate and more candy.
i'm still struggling to figure out how to live in this world and yet to teach my boys that there is so much more to easter {and christmas and life!} than chocolate and candy and food and presents. there is so much more to be gained by knowing Jesus.
and yet
there are sweet memories to be gained by redeeming and enjoying some of our culture's traditions and teaching our children that yes, we do fun things like open presents on christmas and search for chocolate eggs at easter. but without Jesus it's all meaningless.

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.


For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing.


In him was life, and the life was the light of men.

ps i'm totally doing an egg hunt for the boys tomorrow morning. and because we brought home at least 10lbs of candy/chocolate yesterday the only thing that will be edible is pocky. {i'm not a meanie, i promise. my kids go ape-shit crazy for it!} i put pennies, nickels and dimes in plastic eggs and little veggietales characters will be their little gift. i think it's going to be a winner, folks.

lately

There's been a lot going on lately.
This post may bore you as I'm writing mainly for my future self to remember some of these smaller details that are quite easily forgotten.

We're moving out of this house as of May 1st. We'll be living with my parents until August when we move to Uganda. So now our landlords have started showing the house. Have you ever tried to get a house presentable to be shown when you've got 2 young kids? Yeah. That. But hopefully they've found some people interested in renting once we move out.
We've been selling loads of our things - some on Kijiji (oh wonderful, wonderful Kijiji) and some to friends and people we know. The two big things I want to conquer next are the garage *shudder* and the boys toys.
The garage has just gotten progressively worse as the winter has gone on. It's a disaster. I will divide and conquer.
The boys toys are another issue - which toys do we keep and store? Which toys do we sell? Which toys do we bring? I'd like to bring as few toys as possible as kids can really make toys out of anything and I really only want to keep/store the ones that are timeless (like metal cars, trains, some puzzles, wooden play food) and sell/chuck the rest.

Yesterday we went into Toronto to the travel clinic for our travel consultation and first set of vaccines. The boys were a bit stir crazy, but we managed. And they did relatively well with their two needles (each). I felt bad about not warning Noah - he really freaked out. It's so hard to know with him - do I warn him and possibly make him even more reactive or do I just let it happen and deal with the freak out then? He has a super quick recovery time for the most part so we did alright this time. He has one more needle to get before we go.
Jude, on the other hand was not as quick to recover and didn't even want his chocolate "prize". (So I ate it.)
He wailed and wailed and wailed and was pretty angry about the needles. He started wailing just from the swab being rubbed on his arm before the needle. This kid, man. D-R-A-M-A.
And $600+ later for vaccines we walked out with 2 bouncy balls, 6 sore arms, 1 kid hyped up on gummies and chocolate and some knowledge about malaria pills and family planning (among many other things) that will be tucked away for future reference (on my part).
As we were walking back to the car (we parked a short walk away so as to avoid paying the parking toll) I mused in my head that a part of me wishes we were living downtown Toronto with no car and taking the public transit everywhere. Perhaps one day. I absolutely adore the country side and even living in Guelph is wonderful, but there is a City Girl that owns a part of my heart.

Then last night I got picked up by my brother Keven who took me out on a date as my Christmas present (this year my family drew names and he picked mine and his gift to me was a date with him, all expenses paid by him). While I'm pretty sure that he ultimately left it to the last minute (perhaps not, but I wouldn't at all be surprised if it was) I'm so glad he didn't just go out and buy me a gift card or give me cash. He gave me the gift of time and relationship and I honestly can't remember the last time he and I talked one-on-one for a longer period of time.
We went downtown to Wayne Gretzky's restaurant where I had some pretty amazing baby back ribs and then we went next door to The Second City for my first ever (and Keven's, too!) comedy show.
I found myself laughing pretty hard at some of the social commentary that was weaved into their sketches. Too funny. (You know it's funny stuff when you laugh to yourself the next day just thinking about it and then ruin it by trying to reenact it for a friend who wasn't there. Oh well.)
Plus I got to talk and catch up with Keven for the whole drive back to Guelph. I had a really great night and got to get to know my brother a little better - and he's a pretty great guy. Also, he got pulled up onto the stage at the Second City which pretty much made the night a complete winner in my opinion.

Anyway, so there's lots going on these days. My goal this week was to renew Noah's passport and get one for Jude but tomorrow is Thursday and I haven't even started. So, we'll see how that one goes. Perhaps tomorrow should be passport picture day. Or something.

And I'm keeping at my half marathon training although it's only going so-so.

And my eating habits are total crap, but I'm just doing what I'm doing and trying to make healthy choices when I can. I've also decided to give up sugar for lent but there's a whole blog post coming on that one (for reals. It's currently a draft right now.).

If you made it this far, well...bravo. Thanks for hanging in there, friend.
Bon nuit!

the one where I run a 10k race

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

So I do not run aimlessly...but I discipline my body and keep it under control.

1 Cor. 9:24, 26-27

Yesterday was the big race. The Toronto Zoo 10k. And I did it. Not only did I finish the race, but I completed it in under an hour! Okay, so I squeaked in at 59:56 but still! Under an hour!

I'm completely thrilled with my time and so proud that I was able to accomplish this 15 months after Jude was born. I'm also really happy with my time given that the last 5k was almost entirely UP HILL.

There was a point just after 6k that I felt the need to cough but when I did all of a sudden I couldn't breathe and I had to stop and walk and breathe again. For about 10 seconds I walked and mentally prepared myself to start running again. And then as quickly as it started, I was able to breathe properly again and started running again.

The last couple kilometers seemed to go on FOREVER. But it was amazing what a bit of encouragement from the people on the sidelines did for my motivation. As I came to the finish line my legs picked up the pace and were moving as if they were not a part of my body. I sprinted. I finished 4 seconds shy of my goal.

I definitely didn't come in first place (the guy who did finished in about 29 minutes. insane.) but I did get a medal to prove that I did it. And it felt really good. (Although I'm ridiculously sore today!)

Run in such a way as to get the prize.

Running

Today:

I ran 5k and pushed both the boys in the double stroller. Up a gigantic hill.

I.

Did.

It.

You know when you have an internal dialogue about whether you can or can't do it? Well that was me the entire time. I just kept convincing myself I could go to the next driveway or next street or stop light. Or half of the hill. And then to the top.

The boys are really good when they're going fast, so they were great. Jude kept saying, "Go! Go!" and clapping for me and Noah kept asking me questions which I found a bit hard to answer sometimes when I was really out of breath, but all in all, they were a great cheer squad for me.

My 10k is next Saturday and I'm excited. I really want to do it in under an hour, but my training hasn't been as good lately (with all the sicknesses and whatnot) so I'm hoping that the last 6 months or so of running will pay off and I'll be able to boot it for my best personal time.

Go! Go! Go!

Me in Pictures

I've been wanting to blog about this for a little while now but here I sit, finally doing it.

Anyway, it's nothing big...only that, well, lately I've actually liked how I've looked in photographs. Even the candid ones.

This is new. At least since I've had kids {and haven't been pregnant because I always like how I look when I'm pregnant}.

And it's hard to admit that. But it's true. I'm vain. But mostly it's because my self image has gone down the crapper {along with my mental ability to retain knowledge and otherwise IMPORTANT information other than the lyrics to Sharon, Lois & Bram and any sort of stomach muscle tone I ever had}. I haven't even liked how I felt about myself. Because I haven't liked myself. For a long time.

But lately I've been running. And eating yummy food - trying to eat GOOD food, but what with mouth-watering butter-filled recipes like ones from The Pioneer Woman and Bakerella, sometimes I go overboard and it's hard not to eat the last 5 cookies in the container. But I digress...

So I've been running. And while the number that shows up on the scale hasn't exactly gone down dramatically, I feel better about myself. And I'm not sure if it's because I'm learning to accept and love myself or it's because I've actually toned up or lost flab or maybe it's a bit of everything.

But somewhere along the line, I think I've started to figure out this whole thing called balance. And I gotta say that this desire to go for a run is something entirely new to me.

And I love it.

And if nothing else, that is one of the best things to happen to me in a long time.

It feels good.

I'm feeling encouraged.

I ran my 5k in BC and that was at least 2 weeks ago.

Last week I only ran once but I ran hard for about 25 minutes.

Yesterday I ran again. And I was encouraged.

When I first started running a few months ago I found that if I ran on the treadmill, a comfortable pace for me to run at was about 8.5km/hour (whether I was running 30 minutes or 45).

But yesterday I was comfortably running at 10km, then 10.5, then 11km! Comfortably! I am a slow starter, but I knew that once I was warmed up, I could easily go faster than 8.5k.

It's encouraging to know that my body is getting stronger and that even though the last few weeks have been all over the place with getting in good workouts and traveling, that I have a desire to work out and keep at this whole running gig.

It feels good.

It feels good.

running

I'm on week 6 of my 10 week training program to run 10km. Now my race isn't until October, but I wanted to start training right now.

On Friday I walked up this crazy steep hill lugging both Noah and Jude in a wagon and a heavy cooler (not a part of my training) and I think I must have strained my calf muscles because my runs on Saturday and Monday were cut short due to my calf muscles cramping up. I was frustrated and disappointed - especially because my Saturday run was supposed to be 50 minutes long and I was really set on completing it.

Today was just an easy 35 min run and I did it at the Y on the treadmill.

*Side note: I realize I dislike running on the treadmill. Running outside is so much more motivating and invigorating for me. When I run on the treadmill I'm lazier and sometimes stop before my run is "over" just because I feel like it.

But today's run was great! I got stuck on a machine that is only in miles and I couldn't figure out how to change it to km's but I felt really good, completed my 35 mins and then came home to figure out how far I had run. Turns out I ran over 6km! I felt like I could have gone longer and both my legs and my lungs felt fine! It was the definition (in my mind) of A Good Run.

On Saturday I'm doing an 8km run and I just really want to finish it! I'll worry about my time later.

But since starting the program I haven't lost weight. I know that it's because my eating habits are so bad and I snack a lot at night and I have a WICKED sweet tooth. It's a bit discouraging, but I've been (re)motivated to stop my nighttime snackings (again) and hopefully that will help the weight come off.

However, I do feel encouraged that I can so "easily" run for 35 mins. The difference in how I feel when I finish is remarkable compared to when I started running.

Who knows? Maybe I'll attempt an half marathon next year!

Think Time...reviewed

Remember this?

Well, I've been moving forward on the creative front.

I've cooked with bulgar wheat, quinoa (the organic kind and the red kind - who knew?), and zucchini (I know. But I never really cooked with zucchini before.). And I absolutely LOVE quinoa. Too bad Noah and Jude don't. But hey...more for me, right?

I've also picked up my camera a lot more lately - and not just to take pictures of my boys (although the majority of my pictures are of my boys). And I'm going to try out this whole You Capture thing (click on the button on the side bar for more info). I think it'll give me some motivation and inspiration to work at being a better photographer.

I've also been running! I'm now on week 4 of a 10 week training program to run 10k. Some days I complete my goals, other days, not so much. But it's a WHOLE lot more than I was doing 2 months ago!

I'd still like to start sewing and become more confident in that aspect, but there's plenty of time for that.

It's good to get that think time, but it's even better to see what comes out of it.

weekend

We went to a cottage last weekend with my parents and sister.

It was really nice.

You really can't go wrong with cottage living. We ate piles of food. We talked and laughed. We played games and watched old tv shows.

The view was beautiful and my sister and I even went for a long run along the dirt roads.

Then we jumped into the (really cold) lake to cool off.

I finished reading this book (I really enjoyed it) and started reading this one.

I had an amazing nap and a small sleep in.

Noah was obsessed with the boathouse and loved exploring.

He even got to hold his first sparkler.

The weather was decent; not really hot and sunny, but we did have some sunny patches and the rain was an excuse to build a fire in the wood-burning stove and eat yummy soup.

It was a perfect weekend and if I could, I'd spend every weekend at a cottage.

You Capture: Fun

motivation proclamation

This was my first week of training for a 10km race.

Remember this post? And remember how I linked to a 10km race at the Toronto Zoo?

Well, I'm doing it! I'm registered and I'm training (even though it's months away) and I'm SO excited!

So this week was the first of a 10 week training to run a 10km race. It's 5 days on, 2 days off (Friday and Sunday). So I ran 30 minutes on Monday and Wednesday and then did strength training and walking/elliptical on Tuesday and Thurdsay. Saturdays are the longer run and today was supposed to be a 40 minutes run.

So I mapped out my run for roughly 5km including a cool down since I don't have a sports watch. I figured it would take me about 40 minutes to do that.

But I got lost. I realized I had pretty much double backed which frustrated me because I actually wanted to try and do the 40 minute run and not do any less.

So I started running on every crescent I passed in order to cover more ground before getting back home.

As I turned onto my street I slowed to a walk and then did a bit of stretching on my drive way.

I got in and saw that I had ran for about 40-45 minutes.

Then I sat down and mapped out how far I actually ran.

I ran 5.5km!!!! And I could have kept going but I didn't want to get too far away and then have to walk all the way back. I am on such a high! It felt SO good as I was running and I feel so good right now!
It was really the first 3km that killed me but then after that my body got into a rhythm and I just ran.

I feel really encouraged and motivated and proud of myself.

It's been awhile since I could say I felt really proud of something that I accomplished.

*jumps for joy*